Sunday, December 25, 2011

Shark Night (2011)


I wonder what this one is about? Maybe it's a Christmas movie about a happy shark that delivers presents to all the good little boys and girls?

Naw, it's a about a big lake shark that eats sluts and their horny dumb boyfriends. That's ALMOST a happy holiday picture, isn't it? If anything it's a beautiful love story for someone.

Every stereotype that you can possible stuff into a movie - pre-med guy, college sports star, gamer loser, male model, tattooed slut, girl of everyone's dreams, skater dude, jealous townies, shy girl, goofball sheriff, evil hillbillies, and the dog. No cell phone coverage to save the day.

Some spectacularly bad decision making in this one. Bad behavior on top of bad behavior. This film is spectacularly gruesome with some of those 'fish attacking human effects that freak the hell out of me. I would rather fight ONE big fish to death instead of 50 of the little bastards.

This movie is exactly what you would expect from a film about hungry sharks living in the bayou.

5/10





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